Camptown Ladies' Apparel

Last night, I lived an archetypal dream. I went to class, but school actually doesn't start until today.

(Wait, isn't that the dream? It's definitely a dream, but a more universally common (and disturbing) one is the one where we go to school thinking it's the first day, but school's already been in session for days or weeks, causing us to feel alienated, ill-prepared, helpless, and bad.)

I got a really good parking space, and I thought, "Wow, they must've cancelled a lot of evening classes. There's almost nobody here!" I didn't see many people walking around on campus, either, which led me to think that my watch was a bit slow, and classes had already started, so I hurried.

The big tip-off was when I noticed that all the classrooms in my building were dark and locked.

Naturally, there was a moment there when I half-expected all the doors to suddenly fling open in unison, releasing legions of taunting, pointing, knee-and-back-slapping pranksters, whose laughter echoed throughout the hallowed halls.

I would've really had to hand it to them.